Friday, June 1, 2012

Sexuality, Power and Young Girls

[note:  hi there!  It’s been crazy around here the last couple of weeks, so I apologize for the delay!  But get excited!  We have some great posts coming up in the next few weeks, 3 contributors stories/thoughts waiting in the wings!  Before we launch into it, let’s reflect on a new topic… ]

What are the most powerful forces in the universe?  Some would argue they are the instincts to self preservation and species preservation.  So next to the need to keep oneself alive, our sexuality presents a powerful presence. 

Why do we speak of a “battle of the sexes”?  We talk about this tension because our very differences ignite the air around us!  Some would call it a vibrant complementarity others call it a fight for power.  Either way, the differences between masculinity and femininity have led to joy as well as tears.

(This is merely a blog post, so I won’t be able to expound fully, but feel free to engage the conversation in the comments section.) 
Because women have not been understood by men, (we think differently, act differently, operate differently), many civilizations of men have suppressed women to the status level of a slave or a child.  Even in the United States, only 120 years ago, women were as property that men owned.  Her wages, should she work, would be the right of her father or her husband.  This, clearly, is an injustice.  That is just one example; you could find plenty similar examples (even in some cultures today) where women are second class citizens just because of their sex.

Yet, during all these situations, men still desire women, though they don’t understand them.  Women were used, in some cases, as a means for men’s sexual release and nothing more.  Women, rightfully, began to rise up.  They saw the injustices; they saw the belittlement of women and men walking away from sexual encounters without a care.  They sought to bring equality. 

But sexuality is powerful, and a taste of power can fan a lust for power.  Instead of preaching feminine virtues of modesty and self-control, some of these women took the game of the battle of the sexes and flipped it on its head.  They didn’t change the game to include women, they played by men’s rules and swapped the roles.  Men had gained power by using sexuality to dominate; so they desired the same right.  Without thought of what it would do to femininity, they seized the power and ran with it.  Drunk in the untouchable power of “the protection of women” stance, they could influence every aspect of society.  Enjoying their status (regardless that it was earned through masculine definitions of domination and power), they heralded the sexual revolution.

Strip off the protection of modesty and “archaic” ideas!  In fact, strip off everything and let’s have fun!  Far from raising women to a place of equality, we have lowered them to the base level of “if it feels good, do it”.  Women are the moral compass of society, as women are respected, there lies the level of the society.  But what does this radical view do to the next generation?  Where does it leave future women…and what about future little girls?  (again, so much more could be said here, but space does not allow…)

What do we have today?  
Lolo Jones
A young US Olympian, Lolo Jones, announces she is a virgin and plans to save herself for marriage.  She becomes public enemy #1. How ridiculous could she be?  How idiotic!  Doesn’t she know no one does that anymore?  She has been attacked on so many levels and yet, she holds her own.  Why is a young woman who chooses to show self-restraint now the enemy?  Because if the idea gets into people’s heads on a national level, it will put a huge crack in that pedestal of power they have created.

1st Place - 6.78 - US Open 28 January 2012 - Madison Square Garden, New York

Yet, we are holding on to this political power at what expense?  Young girls are encouraged to be promiscuous, because “they’ll do it anyway”, but here’s a condom to keep you “safe”.  Were our minds, souls meant to live this way?  What about addiction?  Are the sex education courses in our public schools which promote “safe sex” creating a generation of sex addicts?  When a person is addicted to something are they ever really free to live a normal life? 

Young girls, just beginning to develop and completely insecure in who they are as persons, let alone women, are almost pushed into these relationships by peer pressure and no adult back-up.  Why can’t we encourage respect and self control?  Why let our little girls go through situations that will scar their psyche for life.  Waiting to engage in sexual intercourse until one is married is not a burden that chains you down, it is a path to freely live a happy, healthy sexual life without scars, without blame.  

It is the freedom & equality, not power, that we should truly seek.

Well, that’s my view of it and I welcome yours!  (Please leave comments below!)
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  1. Wow, SO awesome to see people talk about this publicly. Kudos to Lolo. People are stupid and are attacking her for her decision, but she's the one who is not going to be broken on her wedding day. You go girl!

  2. "Even in the United States, only 120 years ago, women were as property that men owned. Her wages, should she work, would be the right of her father or her husband. This, clearly, is an injustice." Don't you mean to say that this "was" an injustice? Seeing as this is not the case in the current American day and age of course.

  3. From the voice of Derek Jarman,"Understand that sexuality is as wide as the sea.Understand that your morality is not law.Understand that we are you.Understand that if we decide to have sex whether safe,safer, or unsafe,it is our decision and you have no rights in our lovemaking."

    ~Lisa Gibson.